The Selfishness of Loving Me

Loneliness paints a shade of black
Dark and rich yet lacking
We all need the warmth of color
To give the light  some meaning

And as my thoughts ramble on
Not even the darkness hears me
As i wait for the light of day
Even hope  isn't comforting

What is life without love and hope
That someday the darkness will not be
This darkness in my soul
The selfishness of loving me

Unrequited Love

Why must you hate me with your eyes
Why must I seek and find despise
Do you know what it feels to be torn
With holes that show straight through..


Can you see how much I burn 
Can you see these tears
Noting but the search for love
After all these years..

The empty vessel that beats inside of me
It keeps me alive or so it seems
For I once loved but all that's left
Is a broken person and his broken dreams

Empty cupboards and Full shelves

To put all the emptiness away
to feel that I am real
Piece by piece ..shard by shard
destroyed not created..
numbness is my one true friend

see how  now they mock us
As if they fought our battle
they judge...they  poke and prod..
like they know what we were

your flaws through their eyes I see
You are and will always be flawless to me
My love will never go cold..Even if you stop feeling
I knew love once..though the thought of it's truth is now deceiving

Final Surrender

I left everything behind in one simple sweet kiss
For a hint of sweetness never tasted
But love is real only If you feel
To others..just time wasted

There is nothing more that I can give
To make this offer pleasing
one heart that beats and loves you still
with a passion never ceasing


But you are gone ...my sweet dream
To chase what you do not  know
While I am warmed by the past
By a candle's gentle glow

I was one ..But now no more
My shadow is not me
I am a lover forever..till the final surrender
When  I and you become we...

The Middle Ground Of Dreams

I have chosen not to feel you in every drop of rain
I have chosen to be blind and not see your pain
But how can I not feel you..in the winds of the past
Your every memory.. molded in my heart ..forever to last




In the night you are mine though..amidst the floating sky
In the randomness of memory..the dreams that go by
For no one can take you away from me..no not even you
Nor can the harshness of reality..diminish 
that truthfulness of this true heart for you 
  

I Look to You

Can you not recognize my voice.. oh love of mine
Have we become strangers to each other..or is there time
Feel the warmth of my words..for listening is feeling
Listen to them..they drip with meaning


Love cannot vanish over time..that is beyond my belief
How cold are these arms that gave you relief
Do you not see it in my eyes like furnaces they burn
Look..Sweet Love...please don't turn


If you looked once..you would see
What your love means to me
For in it I am weak..yet it gives me strength
And in it I live...in it I breathe..In it I feel..and it I am

A Darker Shade of Red

If you can't hear me to whom do I speak
Or do I ask the wind to carry a kiss to your cheek
One last act of love... one last surrender..
 An aching heart pleads ..Love me tender


For the heart..it felt love..and it felt the rain
It felt the tears..and felt the pain..
It felt love so deep and oh so true
It felt each prick and taunt from you
Who knew how sharp words could be
Those words that said "we could not be"




How long did we fight..but where did our  love go
Lost to the night in it's stary glow
For life happened to love..and we fell to the ground
When the heart breaks..the soul cries..but never makes a sound